Not that my life could get any worse, but yesterday, when I was by myself, I cursed God for about half an hour saying He doesn’t exist and screw HIM. If He truly did exist, He wouldn’t bless people who don’t deserve to be blessed and He wouldn’t allow good people who have worked hard all their lives to suffer alone. It should be the other way around if God really did exist. It really did feel good. I try to be open thinking there is some type of God/faith out there, but every time I have prayed, especially really hard, my prayers have never been answered. There has only been one time where things went effortlessly my way without a peep [ONE out of how many things I have wished for], but everything else, I’ve had to work ten times ten times to get things to be the way I want, and it’s still not the way I want. Just when I get my life back on track, something bad always happens a month or two later. It’s an endless roller coaster and I can rarely relax.
God did not help me get through my battles. I and my support did. MY MOTIVATION DID. HE did nothing for me. I will [I don’t know what I will do] if I become homeless after all that I have accomplished with my life and I’m making sure I never have to go that path.
People and friends always tell me, “No one else I know has your kahunas to do what you do in your situations. Honestly, we’d give up if it was us.”
Whenever a friend of mine who is into God tries to sit with me saying He has a plan for me, I stay quiet and listen. What is His plan for me – to work $9 / hr for the rest of my life? A co-worker I am on good terms with is in her sixties and she said she was working at $8.50 for three years. She should be retired in her 60s. Is that going to be me, too? Is that my path?
As soon as I got settled into this new job, that one girl with the door drama just came at me out of nowhere: like I say — things always come up as SOON as I get comfortable. This time, I handled it much better than my previous jobs. I reported her and she got a good scare to not start crap with people at work. She avoids me now and my job rocks! My Team Lead and boss all support me in this. I did right in not saying something directly to her and reported her instead.
The other day, she whispered under her breath, “Don’t act like I gotta hold open the door for you now.” I was walking behind her to get in. I had my card ready, never asked her to hold the door for me.
I said to myself, “Okay, bish. You asked for it. Wanna have some smart alec comment to say every time you see me? I’ll report you for harassment. It’s not even that serious. I’m not the door keeper.” I wish I could have seen her face when the boss talked to her the next morning. I saw her cussing on her phone in the parking lot – how unprofessional. She brought it upon herself.
The Team Lead said, “Boss talked to her and she won’t harass you no more.”
Thank goodness finally some justice around here.
I think that girl is scared of me now — good — she should be. She messed with the wrong person and should have minded her own business in the first place. I don’t even know her name and that was the first time I ever saw her come at me out of nowhere that I noticed her, LOL.